Last evening, was quiet and silent is a very different way. As if, something, had have been averted. The sky was soft and the breeze inviting. I went out for a walk to my favourite ocean. There were a few enthusiastic walkers and joggers and equally enthusiastic idlers. I am both often.
Yesterday I just felt like, sitting. So, I sat on the grass with my back to the tree and ocean in front of me and the gorgeous sky above. It was prefect. The space and time. And, I had, not a care in the world moment. In my mind I had blended into that moment. The peace, was so rapturous. I was lost in my world, eyes closed, listening to the Sufi rendition of naiharava. And maybe even singing, I can’t remember.
Suddenly I heard a girls voice, ”excuse me.. excuse me”, I opened my eyes, after some reluctance and with some disorientation. There was this girl, about 30 maybe, in her super fit running gear. She came up to me and gushed, that sitting like this peacefully, I made a great picture, and she had to stop and she asked if she could click a photograph. All this tumbled out of her mouth, peppered with apologies and she was breathless.
I smiled, thinking how much she reminded me of me.. Before I responded, she started to explain and apologize again. She said she was just so taken by the sight, and that was the reason, she swore and she would click the picture and send it to me, in front of me and then delete my no. She insisted, even though this sounded creepy she was just being truthful. I believed her, even without any of this explanation. It also struck me as a bit sad that just a simple conversation would need to be explained so much.
She looked flustered now..unsure what to do. I decided to act.
I smiled reassuringly, told her, it was ok, she could go ahead and click the picture. I would love it. And really I would.
She smiled, visible relieved, stepped back framed the picture, told me to hold the frame (she really did remind me of me when I am off clicking pictures of people 🙂 It felt nice to be on the other side.) She came showed me the 3-4 pictures and thanked me. I gave her my no, she said she would send them to me.
The tactical thing done, I asked her name, Natasha she said, I told her mine. After a longish pause she said, she did not expect what happened. I waited. Most times people took offence, she said in a mildly forlorn tone, “I have always been told I trust easily, and I should not…” – She trailed off the sentence. The unsaid was, she had tried and she couldn’t not trust or give in to her hearts spontaneous impulse to connect. She was conflicted, and yet deep down she was clear.
How beautiful I though, and how preciously rare.
I told her I understood, and that this was such a gift she must listen to her heart, no matter what. She looked at me, and we looked at each other – as if looking in into a mirror. She smiled differently and she then went off.
There was no lingering, and that was beautiful. Just another prefect moment. How often I wondered we stretch, the perfect moment greedily, and lose it.
After an hour I did get my picture, and a note from her saying, she was dealing with something really important in her life, a decision she was not able to make. But now she was clear, she could trust her heart. This was a sign she said.
I smiled. So glad to hear those words. It was also a sign for me also.
It was so easy to trust, and so easy not to. These “signs”, are the way universe answers our deepest prayers, but we still have to trust the unseen. I realize not trusting is equally a risk. So, what is the point? Connection happens at this very verge, this encounter. Who knows who or what is chosen to give us the message? And yet they are everywhere. We need to see with our hearts.
Some time ago, a friend asked, What is a sign, how can they see it? How do you know what is a sign?
For me, a sign is, a message from the universe. When there is a conflict or dilemma inside you, perhaps an un-articulated question even, we feel a certain restlessness in the body, like it is out of tune. And we either consciously or unconsciously voice it, in our mind or heart to the” invisible”-something outside shows up, the invisible also talks back.
How..
Sometimes it’s written clearly as words on a car, a billboard, the name of a shop, on somebody’s T-shirt, a book that falls off the shelf. Other times it’s more subtle, as a metaphor, a feather, charger not working, a tattoo, seeing a particular animal, and sometimes even more subtle, like the gentle breeze or ray of sun..that comes just for you. It’s like a private intimate conversation in the open. Our body knows. We just have to let our minds out of it. There is a felt silence in the body, when the visible and invisible meet, the sense of attunement is back.
When the Universe has your back, you can confidently and courageously focus on what is in-front.
I wondered, who would we, as humans, be, if we extended our faith, and surrendered to it.? If we didn’t constantly look over our backs, if we didn’t assume the worst of people, to start with? If we forgave ourselves and others sooner? If we leaned back on the many moments we have lived, that hold us a little more? If we asked a question not doubting it’s importance, and trusting there was an answer out there? If we knew the universe has our back constantly. How would it change our choices and lives and this experience of being alive? Who would we be for each other and other beings?
There are signs everywhere. Perhaps the Signs of our times are changing and pointing us in the direction of deeper trust in ourselves, each other and the great invisible. And perhaps we need more Faith and less Fixing.
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