After many years, yesterday I went with some school friends to a hangout, albeit reluctantly. This place played really loud nonstop, Bollywood music. The place was packed with many people, I had mild social anxiety. It was also called Social funnily.
At one point they played this Hindi number… “Tofah”.. Tofah”..I remember, It is kind of slow-mo echoes in the movie picturization, and the DJ stopped the music, and the people then complete the “echoes”. The sudden stop of the noise and the Echoes was very interesting.
It made me think of Echoes. It brought back, memories.
Some years ago, I had gone with friends on a holiday to Matheran. Any hill station you go to, you invariably find three things. A Sunrise point, a Sunset point and an Echo point. I never really understood the point, but anyways. – I remember seeing people sometimes literally queue up to stand and shout and wait and feel thrilled, when their voices bounced off the mountains and came back. I have also done that.
What I found really intriguing is that, almost ninety percent would either shout out their own names or “I love you”.
I found it either sadly unimaginative or overwhelming, the need to hear your name being called or hearing I love you – loud and clear, to self.
This really made me ponder about Echoes as a phenomena. About what are we really doing when we do this. And how and why are ‘echoes’ so important.
Echoes are not just repeated, reverberation and returning of your ‘Words”, but also feelings, thoughts and ideas. It is both a noun and a verb. It’s a kind of confirmation, that you exists. And there is an ‘acknowledgement’ from the environment of that fact.
Essentially it is a confirmation that we perhaps unconsciously seek, that we are not alone.
It also made me think of Bats and Dolphins. How they navigate using Echolocation. Echolocation is a physiological process for locating distant or invisible objects. By sending sound waves. And when the sound wave hits that object and comes back, they know their location.
I wondered, if that is what we do unconsciously. Try to locate distant, invisible objects, people, and when the sound comes back, we “see” our location. I also wondered, if things go out and don’t echo back, what happens to us. Do we lose our sense of location and self?
Is that what is going on, on social media, in relationships, at work in the world at large? Are we looking for echoes? Of our names being called and some versions of – ‘I love you’ – some proof that we matter – to someone somehow?
Last month while working with some young 16yrs olds, this ‘Need for Echo” came out as one of the reasons of depression. “Not enough likes”, “no one to talk to”, “Feeling Alone”. This anxiety of putting something out there and its echo not coming back.
I realised this behaviour is not restricted only to children many of us are also in the place often. This unsaid, unexpressed need for an Echo. This holding back of our own voice, our gift, our songs, just because of the fear of ‘What-if I don’t hear back anything”
It’s as if we have to look for proof of us mattering, out there. We do it unknowingly often, When someone is sharing a story, we add, ‘Oh this happened with me also, let me tell you my story”. Sometimes it sweet but often annoying. It takes away from the person sharing. It’s rare to have conversations without this.
I wonder what is it doing to us internally and as a society, this need for Echo. And what happens in moments when this need is not met.
I spoke to my cousin yesterday, and she is the fourth person I know in the last few months, who is suffering from “Sciatica”, It is caused due to inflammation of a nerve in the leg. Metaphysically it is a sign of not moving forward.
Do we become ‘Stationary’- get stuck in an “Echo point”. Afraid, what if we move and the echoes don’t come back? How much of our own existence is hinged on echoes? What do we give up for this need? To be seen, heard, matter. Also, since silence is a necessary condition for an echo, are we becoming more and more quiet. And then what might that be doing to our own voices inside. Have we reached a point where we cannot hear ourselves without an Echo?
All these questions really made me uncomfortable. They raise questions about self-worth, about addiction, about our future generations, about movement, about Truth
Maybe – There was more to the Echo’s than what is obvious.? Perhaps they had a different purpose. I remember this line from a book I read that stayed with me. “Girl moves mountains, after mountains move her”
Maybe we are the Mountain AND the proverbial mullah.
Perhaps, we have misunderstood the point of Echoes.
Maybe they are not all about us and our existence. Perhaps echoes tell us that because the sound hits somewhere and comes back, it is proof that “others” exists? – We were never alone. Perhaps echoes are also for those who cannot shout to hear voices and know they are not alone. Perhaps we are not as attached to our ‘independence’ as we would like to believe.
The point of an Echo point is to let us know, we do want to Matter. Telling ourselves, It does not matter is a copout.
Some years ago, I used to have this practice called ”Calling In” which I found really useful. I would loudly call out my name, literally – and then also turn and answer to it. The echo needed was inside. Try this at home.
Perhaps, that is what this mystery of an Echo really is. We are waiting to catchup with our own self.
Let this Mountain move you. So you can move mountains, finally.
This I realised was the “Tofah” meaning Gift , of the Bollywood song. Glad I went.
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